Lately, I have been thinking about the role anticipation plays in life. I suppose my thoughts have been one dimensional because I was only considering the anticipation of joy. I have no doubt pleasure is more fun to think about than pain, than being fearful.
I have always found books to be sources of considerable pleasure. I was excited when I entered 7th grade and gained access to my first real library. The junior high and high school library was located in a study hall that serviced the entire student population.
The study hall was the largest room in the building. It consisted of rows of desks, each row higher than the other, auditorium style. I recall the school day as being divided into 8 periods of 45 minutes. Every student had at least one study hall period. The study hall was supervised by a teacher.
I remember this room not for study or for books, but for marbles.
Early in my study hall experience, I saw a high school boy palming a marble. Huh. The teacher turned her back and the boy gave the marble a good roll, sending it on its clattering, clanking descent down the steps.
Thinly muffled snickers rose from the student population. The teacher frothed. I was enthralled.
Marbles villainized the study hall for the next few days. Then came the day High School Principal Harold Kirkpatrick entered the room carrying a paddle the size of a baseball bat, plucked the most recent marble roller up by his shirt collar and propelled him toward the exit.
The Principal, now in the hallway, spoke in a voice so loud and clear the entire population of the study hall fell into an uncomfortable silence. “Bend over!”
The swats were slow and paced. Each of us anticipated the pending whack.
It seems that it was a couple of weeks before another marble rolled. I envision an unspoken agreement between principal and offender. “If you catch me, you can swat me.” Both had expectations. A contractual agreement.
I was wondering about the recent invasion of Israel, when Hamas murdered and pillaged innocents, including both women and children. An invasion so bad that slaughter was deemed an accurate descriptor of the events. I confess, I just don’t get people killing and maiming children. The words dismemberment and mutilation are used. I wonder: exactly how did Hamas expect Israel to respond? Israel does have a rather long and highly consistent history of responding to such vicious and barbaric intrusions.
I also heard some members of our Congress have tired of supporting the Ukraine’s efforts to defend themselves from the invading Russian Army. Really!
Can you imagine huddling with your children in some dark underground place and listening to the explosions all around you? The terrifying noise one endures when trapped in the midst of an artillery barrage seems to shake the very essence of the human soul. Fear is the anticipation of where the next shell will land. It misses you unless it doesn’t.
“Hey Doc, can you share a dime?” Fear is pain arising from the anticipation of evil. -- Aristotle
