With April being National Child Abuse Prevention Month, I thought I would once again share my story. As much as we don’t want child abuse or sexual violence of any kind to impact those around us... it does.
Many may not know this, but I am a survivor of sexual abuse. Even though my case is different than others, it did happen. It shouldn’t have. And, it wasn’t my fault. After the occurrence, I asked my mother a simple question about the male anatomy. I was in elementary school, so she immediately reacted in such a way that I feared I would be in trouble if I answered her questions honestly. So, I didn’t.
As an adult, I understand her reaction; however, her escalated tone of voice made me think I would be the one in trouble and I opted to not tell her the full account. I didn’t know it then, but she did reach out to the individual and I can assure you I was never put in a situation where that person could hurt me again. By her reading between the lines of what I told her, I believe she saved me from further encounters with that individual.
I learned to bury what happened deep within and, while in college, started having very vivid memories come to my mind. Thankfully, I was surrounded by great friends/teammates who pushed me in the direction of a great sports psychologist. Through Dr. B’s help, I dealt with this act and learned that it was not my fault nor my parent’s fault.
After many counseling sessions, and replaying the act in my mind over and over to tell young Robin over and over “it’s not your fault, it’s not your fault,” I overcame the blame-myself-game. I made the decision to not come forward at that time, as close to a decade had passed.
Fast forward a few months and I was back to playing the blame game when this individual was arrested for child sex crimes. Was it my fault others were hurt? Why didn’t I come forward earlier? All of the emotions played back again. Thankfully, the counseling I had went through earlier proved to be vital again. Because it wasn’t my fault. It was his! All of it. I’m a survivor and am hopeful that by sharing my story I help others. Whether it be from utilizing this tactic, helping with the understanding for parents not to “overreact” and remain calm with their initial response or simply just letting others know they aren’t alone. I’m not a counselor, but, I’m available to be a listening ear! We are a small community, but yet large at the same time. We need to have each other’s backs.
Please try and listen. Please try and watch for signs. A child is simply that, a child. It is up to us to understand what they could be going through.
April is child abuse and sexual assault awareness month. If you are impacted by either of these, PLEASE seek help. Contact your local Sheriff ’s Office, SOS, Counselor or someone who is able to help you and listen to you. You aren’t alone. I promise you. It may not feel helpful when you first start talking about it, but in the long run, YOU will be thankful you did.
Robin Wunderlich Quote of the Week “Glow sticks have taught me that sometimes you have to break before you shine” ~Unknown
